Why Mommy?

July 11, 2007

Sometimes you wonder don’t you?

Why certain people are put through some tough shit.

And I have indeed yelled, screamed and cried “Why Mommy?” often in the past 19 years.

This time, it’s someone else’s mommy! It’s always someone’s Mommy…you have to think of that. Seriously.

WhyMommy is no exception. She has cancer. She is kicking cancer’s ass. And I want to show her my support.

I have been debating on joining this “team of wonderworkers” for a few weeks now (since I found them) because my history with cancer is not bright. I lost my ‘Mommy’ to it…19 years ago.

And I didn’t want to be a downer. I still am deathly afraid of the “C Word”. The fucker. So I avoid stuff like this. And really, I don’t even know her and who am I to talk about this anyway?

Then I read this. And then, as I’m reading it, I realized I wished I could have supported my mother more. I pray she knew how much I loved her and wanted her to fight… That made me think I need to show my support for the team once again. For WhyMommy and for all the other women out there who have been touched by this fucker of a battle.

Some of us have witnessed loss and some of us have witnessed the wonder of the cure.

Treatments have changed. Time has given researchers and scientists and doctors new tools to fight the shithead that is cancer. And I have witnessed women surviving the fight. Kicking its ass and taking names and numbers.

If my Mother chose to fight, she would still be here. But the treatments back then were tough and they made her more sick than the actual disease. And she couldn’t do it. And she hated losing her womanhood. Her breasts. As strong as she was. She couldn’t fight it anymore.

She didn’t want to lose her beauty. But she never could. She was smokin’. I wish she knew how gorgeous she was…even after her surgeries and hair loss and weight fluctuations.

Which leads me here. I want to help all the women out there. I want them to know they are strong and gorgeous and can fight this. They can do it. And they have my support. My heart. Because this is so close to my heart.

So I offer my whole heart and my support to the woman today. That ‘Gorgeous Mommy’ over at Toddler Planet, who is raising a beautiful family and beating this. I want her to know I send her all my love and all my wishes for a speedy ass kickin’. Because the faster she kicks its ass, the faster she can get back to her self again!

Do it for all the women out there! You make us proud.

Join the team. Show your support and send some love.



  1. It’s so hard when it seems like cancer is just circling everywhere.

  2. What a beautiful post. I’m sorry about your mom.

    I’ll have to bookmark this for later & visit it when its not as hard. Thanks for sharing.

  3. I lost two grandparents to cancer. After my grandfather died and my grandmother was diagnosed, she wanted no part of the chemo and radiation.

    She had seen how my grandfather had suffered through all of that. She was tired, she had lived a long life, and she wanted to go be with him.

    That was tough.

    A close friend’s mother died of breast cancer about two years ago – and that was very painful too.

  4. What a great post. I can’t imagine how hard it would be to lose your mother to cancer. Somehow I know your mom knew how much you loved her – then and now.

  5. beautiful post, as always, Janet.

  6. You and I both have asked that question… “Whymommy?”
    I’ve already emailed to become part of this support system but thank you, thank you for your post.
    I know my mom has said the support has been crucial for her as she battled her mastectomy and chemo and know radiation.

    Even though I know you didn’t want to call so much attention to yourself as you did “Toddler Planet Mommy” I’m still sending YOU big hugs as one daughter of a mother affected by cancer to another !!!

  7. Sounds like you have a lot of fight and I’m sorry about your mother. I know about the ‘old’ treatments, my own mother was ‘lucky’ enough to pull through, but it’s so tough.
    Best wishes

  8. Fantastic, powerful post. My hubby is a survivor and my dad is a sufferer. Very few people are unaffected by it all….

  9. A wonderfully written post as usual. You always know just how to tug at the heart strings.

  10. Cancer sucks. My dad beat prostate cancer; my cousin (who’s now 12) beat brain cancer. It touches us all, one way or another.

    Sending hugs to you.

    And any time you’re up for some sand and Velcro Pygmies…you’re welcome to go with me. šŸ™‚

  11. I just want to kick cancer right in the nuts.
    This post was beautiful

  12. That, friend, takes courage.

    Thanks. I promise to not be a downer. In fact, that’s a ground rule of my site — no sadness, no pity — positive thoughts only! Because I know my odds are long (I have a rare and agressive cancer), and I need every ounce of strength to beat them.

    I really appreciate you coming out and saying this. Beautiful post.

  13. Oh, I’m sorry about your mom, too!

    Cancer scares the bajeebers out of me too! It seems everyone who has died in my family, died of some kind of cancer!

    My best friend got colon cancer at at the age of 31! There had never been cancer in her family!! It’s been 5 years … and she’s doing great.. but she lives in fear that it’ll come back.

    Ugh.. all we can do is go in for our check ups and go to the doc if we notice anything!!

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