Shotgun Haiku

October 12, 2007

Haiku Friday

I’m a little off today. And I forgot.
But I refuse to give in to Haiku Friday.

Wish me luck, these were created at 6:30 this morning:

My brain is fried rice
Friday snuck up on me too
I got nuthin’, huh?


How fast time does fly
When you’re having too much fun
This is sarcasm


Preschool mommies are
Just like high school teenagers
Only more wrinkled


It’s no wonder that
Befriending preschool mommies
Sucks donkey ballsack


What is with these gals?
Don’t worry I don’t want to
Take away your job


You were so chosen
To be all high and mighty
class parent for us


However, you suck
I’ve never met stupider
and more self conscious


Get over yourself
You are not God over us
You are human just like us


Give a woman a
set of keys and she thinks she
owns the fucking world


Can you tell I’m mad?
I’m mad as hell and I’m not
Gonna give a shit


It’s only preschool
It’s not about us or you
it’s about our kids

So there. Talk about a quickie.



  1. OH ~JJ! Now I’m scared! I have an appointment this morning at a preschool that has one place left that might suit Miss E! It’s in a class for 3.5 to 4 year olds so Miss E might be a little young for it – and so I’ve been worrying about the kid factor – it never crossed my mind that there’d be annoying moms involved! Wish us luck ha ha!

  2. JJ~just wait until you hit the social landmine known as PTA. Some think they’re all that. And then there were moms like me, doing it for the kids. No power trips here.

    I’m sorry you’re having troubles with the evil controlling mommy type.

  3. There are annoying moms EVERYwhere.

    I can only roll my eyes and shake my head. They need to get over themselves and stay away from ME!

  4. I’m gonna do my best not to get on your bad side!

    My problem is I’m a good 15 years older than most of the Mommies with kids my son’s age. Hell, some of them I could be THEIR Mommy!

    Hang in there. And if it doesn’t get better? Give them the link to this post! That’ll scare ’em!

  5. Why is it so difficult to make friends and why do keys seem to make people feel so flippin’ powerful!?!

    Great quickie haiku!

  6. Wow. And…I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the parents (at least not many of the ones I’ve known) ever outgrow that high school mentality. Don’t fret, though. You will find a precious few who think like you who do what they do for their kids.

    Have a great weekend!

  7. wow, i’m scared too!

    with my first, i was the young mommy in with second- and third-timers (but i was too new and nervous to be a bitch). but when i got to my third and fourth, i was the old fart. and the youngy mommies were like the bitchy junior high girls i remembered from back when dinosaurs roamed the earth. gah.

    you have my sympathies!

  8. Best Line Ever: “Sucks donkey ballsack”

    Thank you for that!!

  9. Very well done…I like the “However, you suck…” one the best.

  10. “It’s no wonder that
    Befriending preschool mommies
    Sucks donkey ballsack”


    this one is OF COURSE my fav.

  11. “Give a woman a
    set of keys and she thinks she
    owns the fucking world”

    This was quite brilliant. I love a long line haiku like this.

    And so true too.

  12. It’s no wonder that
    Befriending preschool mommies
    Sucks donkey ballsack

    My Fave too!! HAHAHAHA

    There is a mom here that is totally a witch … I feel for you!

  13. I hate that dance….
    and your Haiku captures it brilliantly…
    and may I say????
    Scooter is in grade five… and there are times… ohhhh there are times… when you want to say Haiku YOu!!!
    Or worse…

  14. WOW! They sound like nice ladies…..NOT!

    UGH! Hope it gets better!

  15. as always, these are amazing…love them.

    I haven’t been around blogging much this week so I am catching up today…and this is making me really wonder what I have missed…going to read more now…. sorry if I fill your emails with comments…I apologize in advance..lmao.

  16. in my experience it isnt’ reserved for preschool mommies only

  17. These are the kind of room mothers that make teachers NEVER want to have room mothers….TRUST ME on this one!

  18. oh JJ I am just laughing – you were just wickedly creative. I felt like I read an enema. ha ha ha ha !!!

  19. oh jeez. now I am *so* looking forward to preschool…

    hope the day got better 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: