You know what I keep thinking?December 13, 2007
- “What happens when the future has come and gone?”
- Robert Half
I don’t wanna get to the end of my life and be disappointed.
I wanna look back and be satisfied with the path I’ve walked.
I look back and take inventory of where I have been so far and I feel so badly for the teenager I was. It was a dark, dark time in my life that followed me into my late 20’s. It was a good decade of depression until I got help (the first time)…I am proud of myself for taking the steps I took to seek help.
I’ve had some great years in between.
Now, I want the next decade to be a positive one. I have recently caught myself trying to navigate through the dark fog and it wasn’t working. I needed to step out and brush myself off and start again.
I’m in the process.
I’ve used my daughter as my beacon of light and hope again. It is a hard role to play…but it will show her how much she’s meant to me. It will show her how my love for her makes me want to be a better person.
When I die, I want to look back and say, “That was pretty great!”
I want my daughter to respect me and think that I truly did the best I could for her. I want her to be strong and independent and speak her mind. I want her to be the woman I am having a hard time being.
That’s what I keep thinking.