I’m such a Debbie DownerJanuary 9, 2008
With all of this holiday let down/BFF leaving me/meds kicking in….I forgot to mention one of the greatest events to happen in the casa de filthy laundry as of yet.
How could I do such a thing?
Stop being such a pissy pants and get on with the good stuff already, you say.
I said, I know.
Those of you who know me since the first blog that I started in June 2006, know that I have been sweating the potty training for almost that long.
Remember the poems I used to write?
As I sit you down to pee
I pray the Lord you won’t release
Upon the tiles beside the loo
Oh, please not again on my shoes!
God grant me the serenity
to accept the fact that I cannot change Fa’s mind about sitting on the potty;
the courage to change her fears;
and the wisdom to know she won’t be wearing diapers to college.
Remember that I had approximately 25 Potty Posts and 35 Doodie Posts?
(For those of you who don’t know them, I will bring some of them back just to celebrate this amazing occurrence!)
Remember how I stressed?
Well, yeah she’s been potty trained since the summer now, which explains the lack of mention of this subject. It kinda got ignored since she’s been so friggin’ good at it.
However, I neglected to give this next tidbit the celebration it truly deserved. (Those of you in the throes of potty training will revel in my joy!)
We RETIRED the Princess Potty on her 4th birthday!
It’s stored away in the basement. Fa doesn’t use it anymore! Ever.
She went through a long stretch where she would only poo on the princesses. Not anymore my friends! She poos on the big pot like the rest of potty trained civilization!
No more dumping the contents out and disinfecting until you want to sneeze from the odor…
No more TOUCHING doodie by accident!
No more tripping over that stupid contraption in the middle of the night.
No more! No more! No more!!!
We are let loose (pardon the pun) of the restraints of those damn princesses. (I hated those bitches.)
Mocking me every time I had to clean the crap outta their little purple cup.
Smirking at my pain.
Well, they are put away in the princess tower of death for all of eternity. Those little whores.
Ah, the little celebrations of motherhood.
Revel with me, won’t you?